One of the world's premier acting coaches on what we fear, why we fear it, how fear impedes our creativity, and how we can overcome it.
Crabtree Falls
Friday, January 31, 2014
Why not make mistakes?
Most of us are very conservative. You know what that word means, you know what
it is to conserve? To hold, to
guard. Most of us want to remain
respectable and so we want to do the right thing, we want to follow the right
conduct, which, if you go into it very deeply, you will see is an indication of
fear. Why not make a mistake, why not
find out? But the man who is afraid is
always thinking ‘I must do the right thing.
I must look respectable, I must not let the public think what I am or
not’. Such a man is really,
fundamentally, basically, afraid. A man
who is ambitious is really a frightened person, and a man who is frightened has
no love, has no sympathy. It is like a
person enclosed behind a wall, in a house.
It is very important – while we are young – to understand this thing, to
understand fear. It is fear that makes
us obey, but if we can talk it over, reason together, discuss and think
together, then I may understand it and do it; but to compel me, to force me, to
do a thing that I do not understand because I am frightened of you, is wrong
education. Is it not? - Krishnamurti
Thursday, January 30, 2014
Elizabeth “Lizzie” (Vann) Armstrong
Lizzie was the sister of my great-grandfather, Sam Richard Vann, Sr..
She was pretty progressive for her time, and clearly had a pioneering spirit. Hats off to her!
Henry County Siftings
By T. Larry Smith
Vol.17, No. 1
First Woman ever elected in Henry County
Elizabeth “Lizzie” Vann Armstrong 1879-1940 of Headland was born
at Abbeville, Alabama on April 17, 1879 where she was reared. Her parents were William Calvin Huss Vann
1845-1918, a Confederate soldier, and Martha Kennedy Vann 1853-1925, both are
buried in the Abbeville City Cemetery.
Lizzie was the third of nine children that included Dr. James “Jim”
Robert Vann who married Mary Edna Wheeler (this writer’s mother, Edna, was
named after her); Mary “May” Vann who married Probate Judge Hasting Whitman
Owens; Martha “Mockie” Vann who married Dr. Robert Franklin Blackshear, a
Headland dentist, Lizzie and Mockie were very close friends; Samuel Richard
“Sam” Vann, Sr., a Headland merchant who married Emma Kate Solomon; Ruth Armour
Vann who married William Clarence Maddox of Abbeville; William Cass “Coot” Vann
of Abbeville who never married and was a WWI soldier; Daniel Denkins “Dan” Vann
of Abbeville who never married and was also a WWII soldier; and Kathleen Vann of
Abbeville who never married.
Lizzie was married to Thomas Whitfield
“Whit” Armstrong, Sr. 1879-1956, a son of Thomas Sutton Armstrong 1846-1890 and
Martha “Mattie” Elizabeth Balkum 1859-1908 (1) Armstrong of the now dead town
of Balkum, Alabama. Mattie was married a second time, after T.S. Armstrong’s
death, to (2) Thomas Baldwin Gamble 1871-1931 who is buried in the Balkum
Cemetery next to his mother, Mattie and T.B. Gamble had several children including
James Leon Gamble. Whit Armstrong, Sr.
was a merchant and farmer and he and Lizzie first lived at Balkum, AL. Whit,
Sr., was offered the Postmaster’s job at the Balkum P.O. in 1903 but declined; he
and Lizzie soon moved to Headland, AL in1903 where he was a merchant while
continuing his farming interests at Balkum. Whit, Sr., and Lizzie lived on the
north side of East Church Street in Headland next door to Dr. R.F. Blackshear,
a Headland dentist who was married to Lizzie’s sister “Mockie”. Whit, Sr., and Lizzie became parents of three
children, (1) Mildred Balkum Armstrong who married Tom Aust, they lived in
Headland and had no issue and are buried in the Abbeville City Cemetery; (2) Bill
Armstrong was the second child, he married Frances Radford, they were parents
of a son and daughter. Bill was born at
Balkum and was very fond of Balkum where he was a large land owner; he and his
wife are buried in the Balkum Cemetery. Bill was an attorney and later became an Enterprise, AL banker, and his son Thomas
“Whit” Armstrong III, is now an Enterprise banker. Bill’s daughter, Mary E.
Armstrong Weatherford lives in Enterprise, AL where her husband is an attorney,
she and brother Whit III now own the large Armstrong land holdings near Balkum
Baptist Church; (3) Thomas Whitfield “Whit” Armstrong, Jr. was the third child
of Whit, Sr., and Lizzie; he who died in 1950 at age 33 of a sudden heart
attack and was buried in the Abbeville Cemetery.
Lizzie Vann Armstrong was among the first
women who registered to vote in the 1920 county wide elections, in which this election
marked the first time that women had the right to vote. No woman had ever voted in Henry County or
held public office prior to 1920. Lizzie was a determined woman and was an
ardent homemaker, and was devoted to her family, the Baptist Church, school
activities, and her pleasures which included watching movies and playing bridge
games, and was active in whatever public issues that came up in Headland and
the county. Lizzie also operated a boarding
house and enjoyed cooking. Having a strong constitution, Lizzie announced in October
of 1920 to be the first woman to run for a public office in Henry County.
Lizzie ran for the office of Constable in Beat One which was the Headland area
Beat. Lizzie won the election and became
the first woman to ever be elected to public office in Henry County. A number of other Beat Constables were also
elected across the county in the 1920 election; however, they all were men. Lizzie’s
Constable duties included assisting in patrolling the streets when needed,
watching over various public events, serving legal papers and warrants, having
arresting powers, attending circuit court when called upon, execute summons and
return all court papers, pay all monies collected pertaining to the office, and
perform all other duties that might be required by law. Constables date back to
at least 1850 in Alabama, however, only a few cities and counties use
constables today. Henry County has no
constables today as such.
Lizzie was spending the weekend in
Montgomery along with her very close sister, Ruth Maddox, Mrs. George Nichols,
Miss Miriam Jean Nichols, and W.L. Solomon all of Abbeville; when on Feb. 10,
1940, she was stricken with a heart attack while momentarily alone in a
department store and gave the address of her nephew, Cranford Blackshear, to
the attending ambulance drivers; however, she died at age 61 before reaching
the hospital in Montgomery. Headland was
shocked to hear the news! She was
looking forward to seeing the movie Gone with the Wind. Her funeral was held in
her Headland home with burial in the Vann family plot in the Abbeville City
Cemetery. Lizzie Vann Armstrong was a
pioneer in women’s rights in Henry County.
More Anon!
To read more about the Vanns, including more about Lizzie's siblings, click here for my Vann archive. And be sure, when you scroll down to the bottom of each page, click older posts to keep going. There's a lot there.
and more photos of Lizzie Vann from cousin Jim Vann's collection
Lizzie is # 19. Granddaddy Vann is # 17. For more on Granddaddy Vann, click here.
Wednesday, January 29, 2014
Self-Confidence
Many people appear to be psychologically crippled - overcome with fear, doubt, self-loathing, resentment and all the other self-defeating negatives that come to mind. I'm not talking about the normal ups and downs that we face due to life's blows - death of a spouse, losing a job, getting injured, etc.. Certainly not that. I'm talking more about a sustained pattern or presence in a person's life that's clearly seen by others. If you hear lots of people say, "That person is always negative" or "He seems to be always be angry" or "She's always needing attention", there's likely something there. You could come up with a thousand more examples. You might even see characteristics of a person's psychological state in how they treat their bodies. Are they abusing themselves with food and drugs or neglecting their sleep? It could be seen in their relationships. A better test would be what your gut tells about how you're living and how you're interpreting life around you. Unless it's deeply repressed or you're a sociopath, you should feel something. Again, I'm talking about a consistent pattern over the span of a person's life - not those moments where we slip and fall, and then get back up and regain our footing.
The causes of people's afflictions, real or not, are many. Some of it could be the result of the environment people live in, some of could be innate and other times it's simply a combination of factors, some more obvious than others. There could be people around us that bring us down, or we could be a part of institutions and cultures that actually benefit from keeping individuals or sub-groups from reaching their potential. We could just live in cultures where most people live in a depressed state and have a self-defeating belief system that inevitably, by virtue of existing within it, affects us. It can also just be overwhelming circumstances that just make it hard for people to keep their heads above water - financial pressures, work stress, family dysfunction, social obligations - contribute to feelings of unending pessimism, constant worry and paralyzing fear.
To make matters worse, people often times deal with the tension and frustration in their lives by finding and blaming scapegoats. It could be a spouse, it could be children, it could be the Jews, it could be a political party, it could be yourself, it could be parents, it could be your past, it could be another race, it could be terrorists, it could be an ex, anything. I heard someone say once that their inability to stay committed to walking for exercise and weight loss was because of the devil, and that other folks back at the church felt that too. They kind of laughed about it when they said it, but it still said something about the need to find something to blame. When you can't put your finger on it, there's always the greatest scapegoat, the devil.
My belief is that the degree that a person is psychologically crippled will inevitably reveal itself in his/her self-confidence. I also believe strongly that people may not be able to completely transform their lives, but they certainly can make them better. And once you're on that path, a real transformation then can become a distinct possibility. But you have to start where you are, and just move forward. And it doesn't have to be something you do on your own. We do need support in life.
Here's one way to get started:
Socrates said, "An unexamined life is not worth living." How is examining your own life going to propel you forward? And how will the simple art of asking questions help you in this endeavor? Let's start by enjoying this segment of a documentary hosted by Alain de Botton.
Monday, January 27, 2014
Games Young Boys Play
My sister Leslie is second from the left. Mrs. Medley later became my teacher in the 7th grade. I do recognize Wendy Oates, second from the right. Not sure about the other girls. Leslie likes to remind me - and I like to be reminded of it! - that when she invited her girlfriends over to spend the day or the night, they'd sometimes sit on the floor in her bedroom, playing and having fun, and I would walk in (likely the age I am in the picture below). My M.O. (modus operandi) was to get in the center of the circle and sing, "I want some sugar doo, I want some sugar doo, I want some sugar doo." And with their encouragement, as I was singing, I would saunter over to one of her friends and kiss them. It was my version of Duck, Duck, Goose.
Sunday, January 26, 2014
The Intruder
The Intruder - a man in a gleaming white suit comes to a small Southern town on the eve of integration. He calls himself a social reformer. But what he does is stir up trouble--trouble he soon finds he can't control. - Source
One week when I was watching numerous B-rated horror movies directed by Roger Corman - incidentally, the man who gave Jack Nicholson his start - I discovered this film. Produced and directed by Roger Corman, The Intruder was released in 1962, and it stars William Shatner. Surely it was a very provocative and eye-opening film of that era. In truth, though, because Corman was mostly known for his very low-budget, almost silly horror films, The Intruder got largely ignored. But it's a powerful social film, and as time passes, it keeps getting a second look by critics and movie lovers. I certainly recommend it.
In college, I recall seeing images like this, and it shocked me in large part because I wouldn't have expected prim and proper white Southern ladies to publicly display this kind of anger. I could see men doing it, of course, but women?!?!? Just threw me a bit. And so watching The Intruder reminded me that we're all capable - all human beings - of getting swept up with the times, and displaying some of the worst traits imaginable, along with some of the best traits. Although it's intensified in the past few years, for a while I have wondered what life was really like when my parents were growing up, the good and bad. And I wondered what I really would be doing, living in those days, faced with similar circumstances. Who knows? What do they say about hindsight?
Saturday, January 25, 2014
The Ever Observant
One day a young girl was watching her mother cook a roast beef. Just before the mother put the roast in the
pot, she cut a slice off the end. The
ever observant daughter asked her mother why she had done that, and the mother
responded that her grandmother had always done it. Later that same afternoon, the mother was
curious, so she called her mother and asked her the same question. Her mother, the child’s grandmother, said
that in her day she had to trim the roasts because they were usually too big
for a regular pot.
Can you think of a moral for this story?
Tuesday, January 21, 2014
Thanking a Teacher
Recalling His Inspiration, A Neurosurgeon Thanks A Teacher by NPR Staff Listen to the story here.
Now, my personal story.
When I was off at college, there were a few professors that made a significant impact on my life. One of them, in particular, made a huge difference, and I would frequently share stories with friends and family about his classes. If you were in the business school, you couldn't avoid them. A decade after I graduated from Samford, I used the Internet to track down this professor, to find out where he was, and, more importantly, thank him for his influence on me. He had moved on to a university in Virginia.
Here are excerpts from a few e-mails:
Me:
I am sorry to hear that you left Samford, but it appears that you are happy where you are. Personally, I don't think it makes a difference. In the end, it's all the same. You are going to continue reaching students wherever you are.
I think back to my days at Samford when I thought I understood this world we live in. I didn't know anything! In fact, if I were honest, I'd have to say that I was scared out of my wits to truly challenge the perceptions I had of the world. Slowly but surely, I fought my way out of that way of thinking, and have now developed a more independent mind. What's fascinating is that once you break through, it's not scary anymore. Instead, I'd have to say that I'm the freest I've ever been. I do owe you a personal thanks simply because you were one of a handful of people I encountered during my collegiate years who really urged me to test my beliefs. What's funny is that you rattled my world so much back in the early 90's, I never could muster up the courage to thank you then. So, let me thank you now.
I wish you the absolute best and hope that you remain dedicated to what you do best: jolting people out of their comfort zones.
Professor:
Allen, I was thrilled to hear from you. Congratulations on the marriage. Kadesarin is just stunningly beautiful. Boy, you really had to journey a long way from home to find a bride! Please drop me a note to fill me in on how you two met and what kinds of involvements (other than marriage!) you have in Thailand. Interestingly, when your note arrived, my daughter's mother-in-law was in Thailand touring. Small world.
It was truly good to hear from you - and more important to learn that you are thriving on life. When you are next in the States, give me a call. I obviously would relish the opportunity to learn more from you about your experiences and pilgrimage.
Me:
I remember one remark you to our class and that was that we should be prepared to change our life course or career at least five times. You said "gone are the days that people can expect to work for the same institution for 30 years." I believe you! Change is vital for growth.
I hope to always pursue a life of self-education, because I know that it will equip me to withstand difficulties that might come my way, and ultimately smooth the path for any transition I might face. Certainly, traveling is one of chief ways I try to educate myself. Reading is another. I never used to read things outside of the Bible, a few biographies and plenty of sports magazines. Now I can't get enough of any books really.
I hope to always pursue a life of self-education, because I know that it will equip me to withstand difficulties that might come my way, and ultimately smooth the path for any transition I might face. Certainly, traveling is one of chief ways I try to educate myself. Reading is another. I never used to read things outside of the Bible, a few biographies and plenty of sports magazines. Now I can't get enough of any books really.
Well, I know you've traveled a lot, to South Africa and other places I'm sure. You especially know the benefits. Would you mind telling me where you've been and what impact traveling abroad had on your life and thinking?
Have you thanked a teacher?
Monday, January 20, 2014
The Measure of a Teacher
This day I stopped by for a visit. circa late '90s
I took my friends from Seattle & Portland, OR to the school to meet Mother. |
Mother's retirement party |
Bonnie & Marc
Sometime in the late 1980s (I know it was about then because my mother, Bonnie Willis, retired from school in 1989) some of the special education kids at Headland Elementary made ceramics that were sold to raise funds for something. Mother bought a nice ceramic swan that was one of a matching pair (probably male and female). Seems like it was $15 - $20. She really didn't think she could afford or should buy the other one.
A few days later, mother was home on Forrest Street and the side doorbell rang and it was Dinah with the other ceramic swan as a surprise gift. The ceramic swans still sit on the bricks beneath the fireplace to this day!!! We always thought that was nice. I told mother that I saw you and Miles, and she said that Dinah was always very nice and grateful when she would do some teachers-aid work for her at school. Your mother was a very kind, thoughtful and giving person, and is greatly missed! - Marc Willis
Saturday, January 18, 2014
Headland Town Square Buildings
To learn more about Tom Espy (Thomas Franklin Espy), click here.
J.J. Espy is listed as a city council member, serving as treasurer |
Thanks to Larry Smith for his research and his writing.
His scanning and e-mailing skills are quite good too!
I intend to post other vintage photos of Headland buildings here in the coming days.
Friday, January 17, 2014
Headland, Alabama Town Square
If you are able to download and really zoom in on this image, you will see VANN Dry Goods across the square.
This photo is from one of Larry Smith's articles.
Sitting on a park bench dedicated to the memory of my grandparents, Major W. Espy and Edith Vann Espy. The Headland square has numerous park benches like this, where people have honored someone - living and dead.
A video I made in 2012. Dr. Jim Vann (Uncle Jim) of Headland led us on a historical tour of the Headland Town Square, pointing out what he remembers about the square when he was growing up and the changes he's seen over the years. Before we got started on this tour, Kade and I accompanied Uncle Jim to Hardees, where we got a cup of coffee, did some people watching and talked some pop culture and politics.
And a short one from 2012.
Click here for over thirty scanned pages (w/ numerous historical photos) of the magazine commemorating Headland's centennial birthday. Enjoy!
-Images and information provided by Natalie Espy Woods and Marilyn (Espy) McClendon
Click here to learn about this book.
A lot of the images above are from this Facebook page.
Thanks to the ones who scanned and uploaded them.
Thursday, January 16, 2014
Headland High School, Through the Years
Starting with the original Henry County High School, which I assume was on the grounds of present-day Headland High School, I will end up adding photos as I get them. My goal here is to simply focus on the buildings and grounds. The bulk of these I got from this Facebook page. Thank you to the person(s) who scanned and uploaded them.
And nowadays.
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